Egg, Spam, Cheese and Jalapeno Sandwich

Dear Readers,

Here's another yummy recipe. Happy cooking!

Ingredients:

bread
cheese
eggs
spam
jalepenos

Directions:

1 - Toast two slices of bread.

2 - Fry two eggs. I like runny yolks. Hey that reminds me, most times when I order eggs in a restaurant, and I say I want my eggs runny, or "over easy" as some of you might call them, they still cook them too long. Maybe it's a litigation thing. But I remember I ate at The Galaxy Diner in Flagstaff, Arizona once and when I ordered runny yolks, they really gave me runny yolks! It was great! Some people are afraid that runny yolks might give you salmonella or food poisoning or something. Maybe runny yolks are bad for you, but I think I would rather have a short life sprinkled with runny egg yolks than a long life devoid of oozing eggy pleasures.

3 - Fry about four slices of spam. After a minute or two, flip the spam slices, then put the cheese slices on top of the spam slices, so that the cheese melts a little. You should probably use cheddar cheese.

4 - Put the jalapeno slices in the hot pan with the eggs.

5 - After a few minutes of cooking the eggs, spam, cheese, and jalapenos, put all of it onto your toasted slices of bread.

6 - Eat it! I suggest eating this sandwich with a large glass of whole milk close at hand. It's pretty hot, temperature-wise and spicy-wise. If you don't like a lot of heat, then you could either reduce the amount of jalapenos, or substitute them with green chilies. I've had both, but I still prefer jalapenos. I tried this same recipe using green onions instead of jalapenos or green chilies, but that was kind of lame.

Oh, and another thing: It might be best to refrain from eating this sandwich in front of polite company. It's messy. It resists containment between bread slices. You'll want to wash your hands after you eat it. The jalapenos tend to fall off, and the runny egg yolks drips onto your hands and plate, and sometimes your lap. What I do is sop up the puddles of egg yolk with the bready edge of the sandwhich. ("bready" should really be a word. My spell-checker is telling me "bready" isn't real, but I don't care. I'm using it anyway.)

Trust me, this sandwich recipe is a winner, but it's difficult to avoid looking like a slob when you eat it. It's probably best to just eat this sandwich alone. I practically have to, because my wife hates the sight, smell, and thought of spam. I'm not sure if she hates the taste of spam; she refuses to try even the tiniest little nibble. So I wait until she's asleep or out of the house before I cook this meal. In a way, that almost makes the sandwich better. I cook it and eat it while my wife's away... and afterwords I destroy all the evidence... scandalous! Ha ha ha j/k lol :)

Sincerely,
Telemoonfa