Exaggerated, Literally Dishonest Language as a Means of Motivation

Dear Readers,

Reach for the stars and you’ll get to the moon.

May your reach always exceed your grasp.

Have you heard those sayings? I think there is wisdom and good advice in those sayings. I’m interested in how the application or espousal of the wisdom of those sayings affects some of our language use. By that I mean that I think people sometimes speak in an exaggerated, sort-of-dishonest way to motivate themselves or others.

For example, have you ever worked out in a gym or an exercise class, or with a personal trainer? If not, have you ever seen an episode of “The Biggest Loser?” There’s so many “lies” told in those settings to try to get people pumped up. Trainers or workout buddies say stuff like “you’re a machine!” or “you’re a lion!”

Those examples were clearly metaphors, but what about stuff like, “Woo! It’s time for you to sign up for the Navy Seals!” or, “You’re the strongest man on the planet!” or, “Mike Tyson better watch out for those fists of yours!” or, “You’re unstoppable!” or “You could do these push-ups all night long!”

Those aren’t metaphors. They’re basically just lies, right? Why do athletic trainers lie like that?

(Sorry to rain on your parade. Sorry to be a Gloomy Gus. Sorry to be a wet blanket. I’m just trying to look realistically at language use in a gym setting. By the way, as you might expect, I make a horrible work-out buddy. Not only because I roll my eyes at cheery, motivational lies, but also because I don’t like working out to begin with.)

I think athletic trainers and coaches and motivational speakers “lie” like that to get people motivated. Isn’t “You are David! The basketball hoop is Goliath!” even though it’s false, more motivating than, “I think you are mediocre at basketball!”?

In the same vein as weight room pep talks, I’ve heard some people recommend “positive affirmations.” Positive affirmations are short statements that people memorize and repeat to themselves. Sometimes people recite, aloud, positive affirmations whenever things get rough, or maybe every morning while looking in the mirror.

Positive affirmations are kind of cheesy, but I bet they really work. Positive affirmations could be a psychosomatic thing, or part of the placebo effect. Here’s some sample statements I stole from http://www.successconsciousness.com/index_00000a.htm

My thoughts are under my control.

I radiate love and happiness.

Wealth is pouring into my life.

I have a wonderful and satisfying job.

Ha ha ha. Maybe I’m a cruel guy, but I just have to laugh at some of these. Can you imagine a miserable fast-food employee saying to himself over and over, while he’s flipping burgers, “I have a wonderful and satisfying job. I have a wonderful and satisfying job. I have a wonderful and satisfying job.” Ha ha ha. I think there comes a point where positive affirmations stop being positive affirmations and start becoming lies you tell yourself.

(Which lie do you want to believe? The lie that you are smart, beautiful, and wealthy, or the lie that you are stupid, ugly, and poor? Because the truth of the matter is you’re most likely somewhere in the middle of those polar opposites, smart and stupid, beautiful and ugly, wealthy and poor.)

As an actor, I can tell you that it’s so powerful to repeat things to yourself and convince yourself that you believe them. I’ve had experiences on stage in a play where I think I really start feeling real emotions, emotions that my character is supposed to feel. I get so wrapped up in my character that I almost believe, if only for a moment, that I am no longer Telemoonfa, but that I am really the character I am playing.

I remember when I played the Narrator in The Good Doctor by Neil Simon in high school. I was so nervous the night of the first performance. I was sitting behind the grand curtain at a desk with an old typewriter on it. I had a pencil and some paper as props. I remember when there was about 5 minutes left until the curtain opened, I was sitting there in my costume, all by myself, and I wrote to myself in big capitol letters over and over, “I am a writer. I am a writer. I am a writer.” (My character, the Narrator, was a writer.) I think that was a type of positive affirmation I used to help get me into character and perform well. And I think it helped.

I think there’s well-intentioned exaggeration used in romantic relationships, too, as in, “You’re the most beautiful person in the whole world,” or, “I’ll be happy with you all the time for the rest of my life.” And maybe even in some cases, those three little words, “I love you,” could be a well-meaning exaggeration. (Oh… I feel like a creep for writing that.)

What I’m getting at is there are some merits to saying stuff that you don’t completely completely completely agree with or things that you don’t believe with all your heart, or things that you don’t know with absolute, sober certainty.

In one of my recent posts I talked about how sometimes I’m uncomfortable with people saying, “I know the Church is true,” from the pulpit during testimony meetings. Maybe even saying, “I know the Church is true,” can be a sort of positive affirmation.

But here’s something that Elder Boyd K. Packer said that applies to my discussion here.

http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=f318118dd536c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=1d3125292eaef010VgnVCM100000176f620a____&hideNav=1
It is not unusual to have a missionary say, “How can I bear testimony until I get one? How can I testify that God lives, that Jesus is the Christ, and that the gospel is true? If I do not have such a testimony, would that not be dishonest?”

Oh, if I could teach you this one principle: a testimony is to be found in the bearing of it! Somewhere in your quest for spiritual knowledge, there is that “leap of faith,” as the philosophers call it. It is the moment when you have gone to the edge of the light and stepped into the darkness to discover that the way is lighted ahead for just a footstep or two. “The spirit of man is,” as the scripture says, indeed “the candle of the Lord” (Proverbs 20:27).

I really love that talk excerpt. I’ve heard “a testimony is to be found in the bearing of it” quoted and paraphrased quite a bit in conversation.

But wait, my annoying mind wonders, does “a testimony is to be found in the bearing of it” mean that eventually if you say, “I know the Church is true” enough, you’ll start to believe it? Is that all testimony-gaining consists of? Well, that messed-up, because gaining a “testimony” of something by repeating it over and over could be true of almost anything. If you say, “Adolf Hitler was a swell guy” over and over and over, then you’ll be likely to believe that Adolf Hitler was a swell guy.

My rebuttal to myself is that you have to do a lot of other stuff besides bearing your testimony to gain and nourish a testimony. You have to live as correctly as possible, submit to God’s will as best you can, in order to know God’s ways. You can’t just say, “I know the Church is true” over and over and over and expect to receive the mysteries of eternity laid before your mind in a glorious vision.

“For how knoweth a man the master whom he has not served, and who is a stranger unto him, and is far from the thoughts and intents of his heart?” (Mosiah 5:13)

In conclusion, see you later.

Sincerely,
Telemoonfa