Small Talk

Hi, how are you? Good to talk with you again.

My topic today is small talk. I like it. I like to talk to strangers now and then just to say, "Hi, how are you doing?"

And sometimes they say, "Oh, I'm hanging in there." Or, "Just another day." Or, "Well, things are going all right, I suppose. And how 'bout yourself?"

And then I say, "I guess I'm doing OK." Sometimes the conversation ends right there and sometimes it goes further. I had a nice conversation the other day with a bus driver.

The conversation started with me saying, "Hey, how are you doing?"

And he said, "I'm doing pretty good."

And then we got to talking about driving. More specifically, we got to talking about driving in adverse weather conditions. He said that driving a city bus was more exciting than driving a truck. He used to be a long distance truck driver. He said it was kind of neat to see some of the country, but it wasn't like he was a tourist. He had deadlines to meet.

We also talked about who owned the city buses and how they made their money. I thought that a lot of the profits came from the bus fares. But the bus driver informed me that the money made from bus fares only contributed to about 15% of the operating costs. The rest of the money comes from taxes. Interesting, huh?

I often feel like the subjects of these types of conversations aren't as important as the mere occurrence of these conversations. It's like the friendly verbal exchange, regardless of content, is enough. Whether your chatting about driving or the weather or what was on TV last night, underneath the audible dialogue there's a subtext that says, "I want to talk with you. I like talking with you." The wonderful thing about encounters like this is that there's no rhetoric involved.

Small talk is a way to fight off loneliness, I suppose. A way to cut through the isolation of one's own mind with kind words, given and received. It's a way to connect with your fellow bus rider, your fellow grocery store shopper, or your fellow terrestrial sojourner.

Sometimes the city bus is packed and nobody is talking. With all these people around, I think, surely somebody could think of something to say to somebody else. But the problem is, city bus relationships are so brief. Just when you get to know somebody, they'll get a car or get a different job or move or get arrested or whatever, but they're gone.

I'm not looking for a long term friendship when I yak with a stranger on the bus; I guess I'm looking for common ground. I'm looking for a moment when independent souls merge and become not so independent, when two strangers see common ground for a bit. I hate the distance I feel between myself and the other people around me who look, act, and sound human.

Now, I'm not saying we should all wave and smile to strangers walking down the street. I'm not even advocating talking to strangers on the bus. I just know I like it when I have an OK conversation with people on the bus now and then, that's all.

OK, well, hang in there, reader, and have a nice day. So long. Take care of yourself.