Saturday, June 30, 2012

Michael McCord for Pinal County Supervisor

Dear Readers,

Tonight I went to a Meet and Greet for Michael McCord, who is running for Pinal County Supervisor.  I was impressed, and I'm going to vote for him.  Hey, I have a good idea.  How about you vote for him, too?

I was disappointed with my previous Pinal County Supervisor, Bryan Martyn.  I'm glad he was the first Republican on the Pinal County Board of Supervisors since dinosaurs roamed the earth, but all my true conservative tea-party friends searched Martyn's soul and found it void of tea-party street cred. Martyn recently resigned to become a government worker where he, um, governmently directs government parks for the government.  He gets a lot more money that way.  I don't blame him.  Heck, sometimes I think I should quit my private-sector non-union blue collar job to sit in a government office, look busy, and collect buku bucks.   But why should I go on about Martyn when I'm here to give my weighty and hearty endorsement to Michael McCord?

Tonight at the Meet and Greet, I asked McCord if he knew who Jeff Smith was, and he said no. (Jeff Smith was a congressional candidate who ran against Jeff Flake a while back.)  I really respected that he said no.  Usually politicians say something like, "The name sounds familiar.  Remind me who is is again."  And then you talk about Jeff Smith a little, and the slick politician says, "Oh yes, Jeff Smith, Jeff Smith, he and I worked together on a few projects to get America back to work again and fiscal responsibility and citizen empowerment and real solutions for educational progress for the advancement of conservative principles and have you met my lovely wife and children with their perfect teeth and perfect hair?"  And before you know it you think the politician has grown up next door to you. 

That's the way most politicians work.  But not Michael McCord.  McCord knows a lot, but he's also honest about what he doesn't know. 

McCord has a background as a business person and he has an Master's of Business Administration, and he's the executive director of a charter school and he helped the school get on track financially. 

He supports San Tan Valley incorporation, so that's lame.  I don't know.  Part of me wants the services and amenities that will come with becoming a city, like more sidewalks and libraries and stuff, but another part of me doesn't want another layer of government.  My experience with the incorporation of Sahuarita, the town south of Tucson where I grew up, was lame.  Sahuarita built this big expensive city hall, and they run this absurd city bus system that nobody uses but everybody pays for.  And the city council does the bidding of the nefarious Californian developer, Mr. Robert Sharpe. 

So, I disagree with McCord on incorporation.  The less government, the better.

But other than the incorporation issue, McCord is really a true conservative.  I can just tell.  He quotes Barry Goldwater and stuff like that.  That's part of how I know.  Plus I went to his website and I liked it.

As for the other candidates running against McCord, two of them are Democrats in their hearts but Republicans according to their voter registration cards.  Seriously, they just switched from Democrat to Republican a few weeks ago so they could run in this race.  Can you say duplicitous? 

Another guy running is John Acton, but he's a cranky old man who unsucessfully runs for lots of political stuff around here.  It's best to leave John in his living room, yelling at the television set.

And there's another person running, but I don't know who he or she is.  All I know about this alleged sentient humanoid running for Pinal County Supervisor is that he or she didn't have the initiative to make himself or herself known to me in some way.  At least McCord was pro-active enough to impress his existence onto my consciousness via the wonders of modern technologically-enabled communication.  At least McCord, through sheer willpower, thrust his voice, his body, and his identity upon my senses in such a memorable manner as to cause me to write this blog post about him.

Vote Michael McCord!


Mitt Romney 2012

Dear Readers,

Well, you probably heard the news that Obamacare was upheld as constitutional by the Supreme Court.  When I heard the news, I was shocked, and saddened, and angry.  If Obamacare is constitutional, nearly anything could be called constitutional.  If forcing people to buy health insurance is constitutional because it is the same as Congress imposing a tax, as Chief Justice Roberts decided, well, then, can't the government force us to buy broccoli, and call that a tax?  Where will this lead? 

Obamacare, once it's fully implemented, will ruin the country.  I think it will eventually lead to death panels, publicly subsidized abortions and contraception, rationing of care, increased health care costs, longer wait times, an even more bloated government bureaucracy, and a lower quality of life for most Americans. 

And it's a job killer.   Look, I work for a small business.  The owners of the business are scared of what Obamacare is going to do to them.  The business I work for is going to make less money.  And if the business makes less money, that means I make less money.  And they might have to get rid of benefits for employees altogether.

I predict that if Obamacare is fully implemented, several small business owners are just going to give up.  They're going to close up shop rather than comply with Obamacare.  They don't want to have to work harder and longer for less and less.  I don't blame them.  Sometimes I wonder why people get up and go to work every day, when they can just quit and figure out a way to get food stamps, disability, social security, unemployment, welfare, publicly subsidized health care or some other government handout.  It must be an American sense of pride that keeps us all going.

We only have once chance to repeal Obamacare, and it's this November.  If we want to replace Obamacare, we have to replace Obama.  We have to get Mitt Romney in the White House, get Republican control of the Senate, and get even more conservative Republicans in the House.  

If we do all this, we just might save the country. 

If you aren't registered to vote, please do so.  And please vote Republican.  Thank you. 


Sunday, June 24, 2012


Look! The calendar! 
First there's a J 
and then there's a U
and then there's an N
and then there's a E
and when I decipher decipher decipher
all of a sudden WHAM
the appellation of the timely demarcation
congeals squishingly in my soul 
and I breathe out dark mutterings
into a shadowy bottle
but I give you the key to the bottle,
(A key!  Yes!  A key most metaphysical!)
the key that fits the periwinkle padlock on the underside 
latch hooked with a whizzle to the furthermost 
S-curved sloped rim protruding from the
five-pronged stabilizer shaft, conjoined with
the rear-mounted XGS assembly
equipped with seventeen phosphorescent 
sub-tract-post-psych-cardiactrical boom boom rays
(see Diagram 3, Figure 2, Appendix 1)
that keeps the bottle locked
and no one can ever touch the bottle
or talk about the bottle- 
it's really important that no one
touches the bottle-no one-
(If you don't have the key then
how can you touch the bottle?)
unless he or she openly confess with nary a hint of jest:
A month!  A month!  June is a month! 

 And now it is June, 
June the twenty-fourth,
in the third watch of this golden afternoon.
Now, here, this, is a prelude to the deep  night 
the deep, sweet night that, though future,
presently thrusts itself upon my second sight
in this year of our Lord 
two thousand and twelve.

In the nighttime, a badger will be at my window.
He'll chew through the black-rooted bush, scratch the glass,
make a noise most badgery, grumble harsh and low.
Yet it is not a badger at all, only a conniving baboon
dressed as a badger.  Impressive.
Ah, now I see you standing in your naked power, 
you phantasm baboon summoned by the sorcery of June,
you cunning month, you sly, sly June.
How does it feel to be disrobed?