Thursday, September 30, 2010

ASU and U of A and NAU Theatre is Godless These Days

Dear Readers,

Arizona State University is doing a play called "Dreaming Darwin." From the blurb:

School of Theatre and Film faculty members Lance Gharavi and Jacob Pinholster assembled a team of ASU student artists and created a new work that would be a “fantasy on a theme” about Charles Darwin. This workshop production follows a successful 2009 staged reading and is the next step in the evolutionary process of creating a play – just in time for Darwin’s birthday!

Why the heck should ASU theatre students celebrate Darwin's birthday? I'm more inclined to celebrate Darwin's death-day. Geez, a play romanticizing Charles Darwin. What will they think of next?

How about they write a new play, "My Supper with Satan." I can see the advertisement now:

ASU students and faculty have joined cloven hooves to create a new theatrical work celebrating the eternal works of the Prince of Darkness! This play seeks to feature Satan in a totally new light- Incandescent Fuschia! After the show, audience members can participate in a sacrifice on a real Satanic altar! B.Y.O.B. (Bring your own bunny) Suitable for all ages!

Ha ha ha.

Another play ASU is doing is very politically charged. Here's the blurb promoting "La Casa Rosa":

Performance in the Borderlands opens its Fall Season with the presentation of La Casa Rosa, a play that has New York residents buzzing about the other side of immigration: the experiences of families left behind. Drawing inspiration from the real lives and experiences of a group of indigenous women from the town of Tetlanohcan in central Mexico, the play is the tale of two sisters struggling for control of their ancestral land.

Location: Arizona Latino Arts Center (corner of First Street and Adams in downtown Phoenix ), a Performance in the Borderlands Community Partner. The performance will be followed by a discussion with the group, called Soame Citlalime (Women of the Star in Náhuatl, the local language) ... It will be performed in Spanish with English super-titles.

I have to think that this play was chosen with the immigration issue in mind. I think that this play will encourage audience members to dislike Sheriff Joe Arpaio, apologize for America, and vote Democratic.

Oh, I forgot to mention that NAU is also weighing in on the immigration debate by bringing Luis Valdez to the campus. Luis Valdez is an accomplished actor and writer, but he's more into politics these days. He seems like a nice guy, but I'm pretty sure he's a communist. I think when Mr. Valdez visits the Flagstaff campus, he'll work on recruiting new members of La Raza, encourage ethnic solidarity among Hispanic students, advocate for open borders, and advocate for liberalism.

Now let's take a quick look at the University of Arizona Theatre department, and see what they're doing.

They're doing What I Did Last Summer by A.R. Gurney. Here’s an excerpt from the blurb:

As Charlie looks back on the summer he was 14, the foibles of his upper-middle-class upbringing are revealed. By the time summer ends, life-altering experiences have sown the seeds of change, highlighting the wonder of individual will against the crushing conformity of society. Adult language and themes.

I have three problems with that blurb. (I'm getting sick of saying "blurb," by the way, but I can't think of anything else to call it.)

First, the term, “upper-middle-class.” Have you ever wondered why liberals are so quick to use the terms "lower class", "upper class", "middle class"? It's because liberals love to fan the flames of class warfare. It comes straight out of the Communist Manifesto: “The history of the world is a history of class struggle.” Notice how many times Barack Obama uses those terms. It's annoying and dangerous.

Second, "the crushing conformity of society." Liberals are always whining about "conformity." They're busy trying to make free Americans think that they are enslaved.

Third, "adult language and themes." If they have to put in that notice, you know it’s got to be really bad. I remember when I was in high school, my drama class took a field trip to the University of Arizona, and we saw a play called "I Hate Hamlet" and it had the F word in it, and some other objectionable material, including a joke making fun of Mormons. There wasn't a warning or anything.

I'll show you yet another example of the depravity abounding in our state college theatre departments.

ASU is doing "Big Love," which does not have anything to do with the controversial HBO show, but the play's advertisement says, "This performance is intended for mature audiences and contains nudity."

You may be wondering, Why is Telemoonfa concerned with the plays Arizona's colleges are doing? Why doesn't Telemoonfa bury his head in his self-imposed suburban Christian bubble?

Well, I'm concerned because I love drama, I love Arizona, and I love studying drama in Arizona. But I'm worried that Christian conservative students who like drama won't be able to study drama at college without compromising their values. While I was at college, I personally saw a lot of good young Christian sheep leave the fold. And some of their waywardness began in their theatre classes.

Some may say that if conservative Christians want to avoid temptation, then they ought to go to a private college more in line with their values. That's a practical solution for some students, but the problem with that is that state colleges are publicly funded, and private schools usually aren't.

Your tax dollars are funding theatrical nudity! Does that bother you?

Sincerely,
Telemoonfa

Vote in Person

Dear Readers,

About a month ago, when I was making phone calls for the Jeff Smith for Congress campaign, at least half of the people I called said, “I already mailed in my ballot.” It turns out that a lot of people are doing mail-in ballots these days, and so basically I called a lot of those folks for nothing.

I think people should just wait until Election Day to go to the polls and vote in person for the following reasons:

1- Voting at your local polling place is more exciting. You get to see your friends and neighbors voting and working at the polling station. I don’t know about you, but when I vote in person, I feel democracy in the air. I get a sense of government of the people, by the people, and for the people.

2- Campaigns sometimes don’t get into full gear until a few months before the election. Enthusiastic volunteers help to publicize candidates and propositions just before an election. If you wait to vote on Election Day, then you have all the information available to you.

3- If more people mail in their ballots a month or so early, politicians will start to elongate their
campaigns. Even political junkies like myself don’t like to be bombarded with political propaganda months and months before an election.

4- Scandals often break shortly before an election. Take Ben Qualye, the next Representative from Arizona, Congressional District 3, for instance. It wasn’t found out that he wrote for a raunchy website until after mail-in voting had begun. I bet there were plenty of early voters who wished that they could have changed their vote after Ben’s dirty little secret came to light.

5- If more than half of people vote early, then I think we’re wasting a lot of taxpayer money by setting up polling stations and paying the poll workers and so on.

But I understand there a lot of benefits to voting early by mail, too.

See you later.

Sincerely,
Telemoonfa

Friday, September 24, 2010

NAU Theatre is Raunchy These Days

Dear Readers,

So I just took a peek at Northern Arizona University’s 2010-2011 Theatre Season.

They’re doing Equus. It’s a morally bad play that’s got major nudity in it. Maybe I should write a letter to the editor complaining about it.

They’re also doing The Last Days of Judas Iscariot. I’ve never heard of that play before, but here’s the promotional blurb about it:

In a hilarious dissection of history’s most legendary betrayal, Pontius Pilate, Mother Teresa, and Sigmund Freud are called to testify in a trial of Judas Iscariot. Mixing the urban vernacular with the holy and divine, arguments fill the courtroom over where Judas should reside–heaven or hell, and who is truly to blame– he or God.

My guess is that the play is going to be very sacrilegious. Religion will be mocked, and godless liberals in the audience will laugh.

Man, what’s with Mac Groves, Robert Yowell, and other liberal theatre professors wanting their students to get naked on stage?

I remember when I was in the Grapes of Wrath at NAU in the Spring of 2008. During the final scene of that play, Rose-of-Sharon Joad was supposed to breastfeed a starving stranger. The director, Dr. Robert Yowell, wanted her to actually expose her breast to the audience. It would be more powerful, Yowell figured.

I was nervous to be in a play that had nudity in it. (I was also nervous about being in a play where I had to repeatedly take the Lord’s name in vain, but that’s another story.) Thankfully, even though the actress playing Rose-of-Sharon was a left-leaning vegetarian, she had enough decency to ask the director if she could please keep herself covered. The director relented, and it was decided to have Rose-of-Sharon cover herself up with a blanket while she pretended to breastfeed. Thank goodness.

Also in Grapes of Wrath, for set decoration, Robert Yowell had a giant naked lady painted on the backdrop. It was supposed to be “artistic.” I remember Yowell saying that the giant naked lady represented the lushness and promise of California.

Whatever.

Looking back, the whole play was a bunch of amoral communist propaganda.

Sincerely,
Telemoonfa

Monday, September 20, 2010

Replies to Comments

Dear Readers,

Sometimes when I read comments that you write here on Telemoonfa Time, I want to reply to them, but then I get distracted by yummy food in the fridge or my 1-year-old daughter crawling over the keyboard. So I'd like to devote this post to replying to some old comments on various posts.

First, s. asked on my last post, Stop Recycling,

is this a serious post or are you being sarcastic? i can't tell.....

Response: It's a serious post, but sometimes I got carried away. I am concerned that kids these days have replaced traditional Christian concepts of morality with new, not-so-Christian concepts of morality. I feel that there is a God-shaped vacuum in people's hearts, and they need to fill it with God, or perhaps with extreme enviornmentalism. People inherently want a sense of right and wrong, and I think that being green can satisfy that urge. But I got carried away when I was writing the post. I never buy six-packs of soda with those little plastic rings, and I never throw away paper on purpose, but I also don't recycle. And when I taught school, I got rid of my little blue recylcing can, and when students asked me, "Where do I recycle this paper?" I would just say, "Throw it away. We don't recycle in my classroom." Ha ha ha. And I still don't recycle.

Here's a comment from the Boid on Jeff Smith lost :(

"You have a lot to learn about politics, son." This reminds me of a line from an old movie: "Forget about it Jake, it's Chinatown." I live outside Arizona and haven't paid attention to this race, but I think Anonymous is right, Telemoonfa does have a lot to learn about politics. One thing to learn (if he hasn't already) is that the odds are astronomically stacked against the contender in a party primary. The party ALWAYS* supports the incumbent. Another thing to learn is that political parties are about the perpetuation of the party moreso than the advancement of good government. Both major parties are this way.

*there are very few exceptions to this. The Boid

Response: Yeah, there are few exceptions to this, but there have been a handful of exciting upsets in Republican primaries this year. Rand Paul in Kentucky, Sharron Angle in Nevada, Marco Rubio in Florida, Mike Lee in Utah, and my new favorite politician, Christine O'donnell in Delaware. I'm optimistic that the country is moving in the right direction, politically. And even though Jeff Smith lost, there are still plenty of good candidates who need our help. Here in Arizona, I hope my friends in Flagstaff and Payson will support Dr. Paul Gosar. Down in Tucson, I hope my family and friends will vote for Jesse Kelly, and also in the Tucson area, I hope the folks down there will support Ruth McLung. I'm very optimistic about how these fresh conservative politicians can undo a lot of the damage being done by Obama and the Washington establishment. And I'm very optimistic that in 2012, Obama will be voted out and replaced by a Republican. I'm hoping Mitt Romney will run and win, and then the country will be so much better.

On my recent post Dawes, Bethcabforcutie wrote

i love dawes! I have their album, but i didn't pay for it ;-) I don't like the radio much either. I only really listen to classic rock or oldies stations and even they play the same old generic songs. Good thing we have ipods!!!

Response: I love Dawes too! They're incredibly awesome. And I love my iPod! Glad to see you're still reading my blog. I imagine you don't comment on my political posts because you're a very liberal liberal living in the liberal Flagstaff going to the liberalest University in the State! That's fine though. Well, it's not fine, really. You should be conservative. Everyone should be conservative! And I'm confident that one of these days you'll see the light. Just keep reading this blog and conservative stuff. Let conservative stuff seep into your brain. Before you know it, you'll be waving a "Don't tread on me" flag and shouting portions of the Declaration of Independence at City Council meetings. Ha ha ha. Have you figured out what you want to be when you grow up yet?

On my post, My Sample Ballot for the August 2010 primary, anonymous wrote:

1st of all, I'm not tan. I'm Chickasaw. It's genetic. Secondly, I do like to have fun with metaphors and analogies. Next, I'm surprised that someone would be impressed by a man who has planned on running for two years and still believes "Stop funding of illegals" is a single piece of legislation, and campaigns off of platitudes without details. Lastly, my kids are sooooooo cute, and I've got one more coming in Dec. Boooyah! Smith is taller. Which he cleverly accentuates by having his shirt unbuttoned to just slightly above his navel.

Response: Wow! I love it when real live politicians comment on my blog! I've had Bryan Martyn comment, Richard Grayson comment, maybe some other ones, and now this one is Matt Byers! Byers recently ran against Steve Smith in the Republican primary for State Senator from Legislative District 23. Matt, I'm sorry I called you tan when that's your ethnicitiy. Gosh, I'm embarassed. Look, I respect the heck out of you for being conservative and for running for office. Thanks for coming to the Meet and Greet in Apache Junction and taking the time to talk to me and my wife. I really respect your efforts, especially because you were not getting paid to campaign, and it probably cost you a lot of time, effort and money to run for office. I don't know if I could ever do it. Maybe you should run for some other political office someday. But I did vote for Steve Smith and I support him now. I hope you can be a good fellow Republican and endorse Steve Smith now. You know he'll be better than the Democratic incumbent Rebecca Rios!

contract hell wrote on my Northstar Alarm Chronicles post

NoRTH STAR ALARM IS HORRIBLE DO NOT CHOOSE THEM, THEY WILL LIE TO YOU ANYWAY THEY CAN TO WRAP YOU UP IN THEIR 5 YEAR + CONTRACT, THEY HAVE A "C" RATING WITH THE BBB, READ ALL THE COMMENTS ABOUT NORTHSTAR ALARM!!!!!!!!! I AM PAYING FOR AN ALARM SYSTEM THAT DOES NOT WORK AND STUCK IN A CONTRACT FOR ANOTHER 4 YEARS - WILL HAVE SPENT $3000 WHEN ALL SAID AND DONE. MY GOAL IS TO POST THIS ON EVERY MESSAGE BOARD I CAN FOR EVERY DAY THAT I AM IN THIS CONTRACT HOPEFULLY 4 YEARS WORTH OF COMMENTS WILL SAVE SOMEONE FROM USING THIS SERVICE. HOPE THIS CATCHES SOME GOOGLE TAGS: NORTHSTAR ALARM FRAUD NORTHSTAR ALARM LIE NORTHSTAR ALARM BAD CUSTOMER SERVICE (SPENT 40 MINUTES ON THE PHONE WAITING FOR A REP TO TELL ME HE COULDN'T HELP ME) NORTHSTAR ALARM LIARS NORTHSTAR ALARM SCAM YOU COULDNT SELL ALARMS WITH NORTHSTAR BECAUSE OF ALL THE BAD COMMENTS THEY GET ON THE INTERNET - BEST OF LUCK TO YOU IN THE FUTURE AWAY FROM THEM

Response: I'm sorry to hear about your experiences with Northstar Alarm. What makes me feel bad is the idea that I could have been the one who got you to sign the contract in the first place. But maybe you should move on emotionally. Your contract with Northstar Alarm seems to be really upsetting you every day. I don't think it's healthy to hang on to anger like that. On another note, there were some other comments on that post that bothered me. It reminded me that I've failed at a lot of things in my life- selling alarm systems, making money at writing, teaching... I'd rather not think about my brief stint with Northstar Alarm Services anymore. I like my job now, and I like my house and family and church now, so that's good.

On my Is Computer = I More Stupider? post, an anonymous commenter wrote,

With or without computers, Arizona morons are, by nature, stupid.

Response: I get a few comments that just say I'm stupid. These comments are probably from liberals who don't feel like debating the issues, but they like to call me dumb and they like to make fun of conservatives. I put links up to the CATO Institute and the Goldwater Institute in my little section of "Links to Good Places on the Internet" because those Institutes do a wonderful job of explaining why small government and low taxes are better than bigger government and high taxes. I've learned a lot from reading some of their material. Those Institutes use reason, history, and research to defend their views. Although I do feel like I'm an educated conservative, I don't have to re-invent the wheel and re-explain why conservatism is better than liberalism here on Telemoonfa Time.

On my controversial post, Sex, Sterling Gray wrote,

Telemoonfa, am I a bad person because I have only read your posts about sex?

Response: Ha ha ha!

On my post Report on the Panel Meeting on San Tan Valley Incorporation, Bryan Martyn wrote,

Thanks for a great post. And good on ya for thinking about getting more involved.

Agree or disagree with the issue, we need clear thinkers as you who are willing to step up.

The incorporation issue is different to every family. Heck, every person. The beauty of the issue is that it will be determined by a vote of the people. Neither I, nor Mr. Johnson, nor a concerned Apache Junction citizen will determine your future; you will.

Keep up your writings and please feel free to contact me directly if you have questions or you'd like to learn more about how you can get involved.

Response: Wow! It's a politician writing on my blog! And he sounds like a politician! About Bryan Martyn, I'm glad that he's strong on national defense. He served in the military for 20 years, and I really respect that. I met him in person once and he was very nice. Too bad he recently voted to increase Pinal County's property taxes. Now that I'm a land-owner, I'm more concerned with property taxes. But you renters should be concerned with property taxes, too, because landlords just pass on the cost of taxation to the renters, and your rent goes up.

OK, see you later!

Sincerely,
Telemoonfa

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Stop Recycling

Dear Readers,

You should stop recycling. It’s dumb.

Did you know that one time my Dad was at the town dump and he saw a taxpayer funded dump-worker move a big metal bin of glass over and throw it away with the rest of the regular garbage? People had to separate their glass and put it in the special bin, or else they got charged a fee, but then the dump workers just threw it away anyway. My Dad asked the guy why he was mixing the glass with the rest of the trash, and the guy said, “Oh, well, the place that we give the glass to doesn’t need any more glass right now.”

Grrr! How often does that happen? Probably a lot!

I have a sneaking suspicion that recycling creates a bigger carbon footprint than not recycling. Now that people recycle, you need a recycling trashcan as well as your regular trashcan, a recycling dumpster as well as a regular dumpster, and a recycling processing center as well as a regular landfill. And, to enforce recycling programs, you have to establish a Bureau of Recycling with plenty of planners and managers and organizers and quality control specialists (and of course all those folks will need to conduct retreats and do team-building exercises and have therapy and great salaries and pensions and paid vacations). In addition the astronomical staffing requirements to run the Bureau of Recycling, the Bureau requires the latest and greatest technology!

Look, in Great Britain, there are microchips in people’s trashbins!

Look, in Canada, security cameras are everywhere, and government spies are video-taping your garbage habits!

Look, in San Franscico, you get fined a hundred smack-a-roos for not recycling! But if you leave your recyling bin in the street for too long, you get fined another hundred smack-a-roos!

And if we don't fight against recycling right now, it might be too late!

That's why I'm asking you to take a stand. I know it will be hard for some of you, but I need you to join me on this one.

Get out a fresh piece of paper. A brand new white piece of paper. Do you have it in your hands?

OK.

Now rip it up! Tear it into little bitty pieces! Now go throw it in your trash can! Did you do it? Good. Now give yourself a pat on the back, because you just helped America!

I had a conversation about morality on the NAU campus, a guy said, “Hey, I don’t think I’m that bad of a guy. I mean, I’m not going to throw trash on the ground on purpose or anything.”

Isn't it funny that the first example of immorality that came to this college student’s mind was not disposing of trash properly? Why didn’t he say, “Hey, I don’t think I’m that bad of a guy. I mean, I always tell the truth,” or "I'm saving myself for marriage."

Without further ado, I bring you my 8-point trash platform.

Telemoonfa's Trash Platform:

1. Telemoonfa opposes all measures to force residents to use the same trash service.

2. No more guilt-inducing public service announcements about recylcing.

3. No more billboards, commercials, etc., telling us we should recylce.

4. No more bragging about how much post-consumer material went into whatever product you're consuming.

5. No more little stickers on disposable cups that say, "After enjoying this beverage, please be kind to Our Mother. Recylce this cup, or re-fashion it into a wind-chime/bird feeder while listening to Enya. Peace." I hate those stickers!

6. No more recyling. Just manufacture more stuff when you want it. And then throw away the stuff after you've used it or you're tired of it.

7. Don't cut the plastic rings that come on six-packs of soda. That way, little birds and rodents will get stuck in them. Once the animals are trapped, we can kill them and eat them, and turn their feathers and paws into charms. We can sell the charms, and that will revitalize the economy.

8. I guess you can safely dispose of motor oil, grease and car batteries. And maybe burning tires in your backyard isn't such a good idea.

Sincerely,
Telemoonfa

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Terry Jones vs. Lots of Angry Muslims

Dear Readers,

So I’ve been following the burning the Koran story. And I want to write about it.

First of all, I need to say that I don’t think Pastor Terry Jones ought to burn any Korans. I don’t think he should encourage anybody to burn any Korans. Burning a book that so many people believe to be the holy Word of God is wrong. I would be terribly offended and saddened if someone burned the Bible and/or the Book of Mormon in an act of protest.

If Terry Jones doesn’t like Islam, why doesn’t he just say something like, “Islam is a false religion. Muhammad was not a true prophet. Sure, some of the Muslims are nice folks, but everyone should be Christian, and not Muslim.” He could even say that Muslims are horrible sinners and they’ll burn in Hell forever. Or why doesn’t he just write letters to the editor of his local newspaper? Why doesn’t he encourage his followers to spread his anti-Islamic message through literature and arguments? Why does Terry Jones feel that he has to burn Korans and be so shocking and offensive?

I’ve never really understood protestors who do big symbolic, shocking things, like the folks who burn the American flag. Why don’t they just say, “In my opinion, America is not that great. America has done a lot of bad things, like enslaving people, disenfranchising minorities, and giving Paris Hilton her own reality TV show. I hear that things are much better in Holland.”

Well, for some reason the act of burning an American flag is more dramatic and shocking, even though all the flag-burners are trying to say is, “I hate America. America is bad.”

Well, I think that burning the flag just makes the flag-burner look immature. I’ve always kept my distance from protestors who speak symbolically through vandalism, or messing with effigies, or blowing stuff up. I prefer protestors to speak literally, not symbolically.

Like remember when Sinead O Connor tore up a picture of the Pope on Saturday Night Live? I thought that that incident was in very poor taste, and I lost respect for the woman. Why didn’t she just call together a press conference and say, “I don’t care for the Pope or the Catholic Church for the following reasons...” She might not have generated as much press, but at least she would have been taken a lot more seriously by mature adults who are persuaded by arguments and not by shocking stunts.

But then again, the original Boston Tea Party people dressed up like Native Americans and dumped a bunch of tea into the sea. They were violent, rowdy protestors. They didn’t just politely ask King George III to stop being so tyrannical; they staged big demonstrations and they destroyed property and they used violence. And I guess it’s kind of cool to see people dress up and block traffic and yell into bullhorns. It breaks up the monotony of the day.

And the Supreme Court has ruled that burning the flag is protected under the freedom of speech clause in the First Ammendment. And so is burning the Bible or the Book of Mormon or the Koran.

But if you read this article, the most shocking thing to me is not Pastor Terry Jones’ plans to burn Korans, but this prominent Muslim’s response to the situation:

"If this [burning the Korans] happens, I think the first and most important reaction will be that wherever Americans are seen, they will be killed. No matter where they will be in the world they will be killed."

I'm not sure, but that statement might be a threat.

And Terry Jones claims that he has received over a hundred death threats, and I believe him. Radical Muslims have been known to threaten people with death, and they’ve also been known to carry out their threats.

That is not the way Muslims should respond. They should not kill anyone. They should not threaten people with death or violence. They should not use this incident to radicalize Muslims or incite more violence and terror.

So, what should Muslims do in response? Um, how about publish articles, write letters, chat about it with friends and neighbors? How about blog about it?

Wait, I have another idea. Why don't the offended Muslims hold a candlelight vigill? Or maybe they could write poems and songs about how much they dislike Terry Jones, and about how much they love the Koran?

But maybe the best thing Muslims can do about the Koran-burning is ignore it.

I mean, as a Mormon, I’ve kind of been in a similar situation as Muslims are. People have desecrated the Bible and the Book of Mormon before, and what have I done about it? Nothing. I just keep going to Church and saying my prayers and trying to raise a god-fearing family.

The only time I recall responding to messed up anti-Mormon stuff is when HBO did an episode of Big Love with sacred temple stuff in it. I called HBO and told them I was offended and I wished that they wouldn’t air the episode. I think they aired the episode anyway. I can't remember. But I didn’t threaten anybody’s life or do anything violent.

I think this whole burning-the-Koran thing can be a teachable moment. Muslims can learn to accept constructive criticism and to turn the other cheek. And Terry Jones can learn that doing really offensive things at the right time gets you famous.

Sincerely,
Telemoonfa

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Steve Smith! Part Two

Dear Readers,

If it weren’t for Steve Smith and the propositions, I might not even vote this upcoming November 2nd. I mean, John McCain is going to win no matter how I vote, and so is Jan Brewer, and so is Jeff Flake, and so are most of the Republican candidates for state offices. This is a Republican year. Many Democrats are upset with Obama, and so lots of them are becoming Republican or Independent. That’s good news, but I sort of wish I could vote in a more exciting race, like Sharron Angle vs. Harry Reid in Nevada, or Ron Johnson vs. Russ Feingold in Wisconsin.

Luckily, there’s an exciting race in my Legislative District, good old LD 23: Steve Smith vs. Rebecca Rios.

I’ll be voting for Steve Smith.

Steve Smith is clearly the better candidate. I think I’ll help out with his campaign a little bit, but I don’t think I’ll invest so much emotionally as I did with Jeff Smith’s campaign.

I think Steve Smith’s got a really good chance of winning, because he’s the Republican, and like I said, this is a Republican year.

But um, he might lose just because Rebecca Rios has money, name recognition, connections and she’s the incumbent. Plus, Rebecca Rios has a ka-billion signs up in my neck of the woods, and I haven’t seen a single Steve Smith sign. So I think Smith should work on closing the sign-gap.

But Rebecca Rios is soooo liberal!!! And she really needs to lose!!!

I already wrote about Rebecca Rios’s ultra-liberal liberalness here.

Rebecca Rios is the definition of a career politician. If you look up “career politician” in the dictionary, you’ll see a picture of Rebecca Rios.

When Rebecca Rios was in high school and it was career day, Rebecca went straight to the “politics” booth and stayed there all day. She got an A + in government class, not because she really understood any of the content, but because she did an oral interpretation of the Miranda rights dressed up as a sexy Lady Liberty.

Steve Smith, on the other hand, is a conservative new-comer who, unlike Rios, has actually had some private sector jobs. And he’s very Christian, and he’s got an adorable wife and kids. And it looks like he’ll really work on fixing the illegal immigration problem, which, in turn, would help the economy problem. I don’t agree with him on everything. I wish he were a little more socially conservative. Well, I’m sure he’s socially conservative when it comes to his personal life, but he might be a bit more libertarian when it comes to, say, the marijuana issue. I thought I read a survey he filled out once about social issues, but I can’t find it now. Anyway, Steve Smith is pro-life, so that’s good. Blah blah blah,

Vote for Steve Smith this Tuesday, November 2nd!

On another note, I’m still stewing over Jeff Smith’s loss. What makes my sorrow deeper is the fact that a gigantic Jeff Flake billboard went up just the other day on the 60 freeway in Mesa on my drive home from work. Gosh, did Flake have to rub his victory in like that? Why didn’t he put up the billboard before the primary, when he actually had some competition? Now he’s just wasting money. And I thought Flake was supposed to be the champion of penny-pinching!
Rebecca Schneider, the lesbian socialist librarian, has no chance of beating the Eagle Scout, farmhand, and GQ model all-rolled-into-one Jeff Flake. (OK, I'm not 100% sure that Schneider is a lesbian, but unless my gaydar is malfunctioning, um... come on... she wears a man's haircut... she loves dogs... it doesn't take Scooby-Doo to solve this mystery!)

I’ve got a message for you, Jeff Flake: I’ll vote for you, and if I see you at church I’ll smile and shake your hand, but whenever I see your gratuitous billboard, I'll make a Wolverine-clawing motion with my hand in the air!

Sincerely,
Telemoonfa